Replacements
by Lycoris B
Summary: Three teachers go missing, and three not-quite teachers take their place. Kurt wants to know what's going on, and the Doctor is only too eager to tell him. Rated T for language.  Only the prologue so far, but more coming very soon!
1. Prologue

**This is my first time writing Doctor Who, Glee, and a crossover, so I'm pretty new to all of this :P**

**I know this is quite short but it's kind of the prologue, so there will be more when it's not 1:30 in the morning.**

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Kurt Hummel stared out of the window, his chin rested on his hand. It was only the first day back but he had already got slushied, shoved into the lockers twice and Karofsky even went as far to lock him in the janitor's closet at lunch. Luckily he was only captive for half an hour before the janitor needed to fetch more bleach.

Kurt sighed and glanced at his watch for the hundredth time. He could accept the fact that this was a new English teacher, but ten minutes late was just being silly.

Kurt went back to the window; he didn't mind that it was a little cold to be near: It faced the parking lot, and this way he could make sure no-one would spray paint '_FAG_' on his car again. He could see right out of the school gates from where he sat, and his gaze stopped at a flash of bright blue wood peeking from between two cars. How weird.

The door burst open, Kurt's head whipped around to see what could only be described as the strangest man he'd ever seen:

A fez sat lopsided on his head, and there was a smudge of dirt on his boyish face. His hair was practically begging to be cut, and Kurt glanced over his old-fashioned outfit with mild approval before he saw something that made him sit up a little straighter:

Their new English teacher was wearing a bow-tie.

Bow-ties were cool.

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**Please review! I don't quite know where I'm going with this at the moment so your thoughts and ideas would be appreciated :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**I love writing the Doctor, oh my God.**

**Thank you all so much for all the feedback I got from the prologue! I seriously wasn't expecting it, thank you all so much!**

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"Shakespeare!" The teacher yelled, pointing at the ceiling. "Great bloke, a little frisky but I can live with that, and very, _very_ clever!"

He said all this very fast, striding to the front of the class and gesturing a lot with his arms.

"We've already learned Shakespeare..." A voice muttered. The man chuckled.

"No you haven't!" He said cheerfully.

Then he stopped and spun around on his heel, turning to point right at Kurt.

"_You._" He said, Kurt's heart just about stopped right there. This man was completely unpredictable, insane probably.

"Keep up the good work," the teacher tapped his own bow tie and grinned at Kurt, who smiled and gave him a thumbs-up back.

"Now!" The teacher continued, "I am the Doctor, and you will address me as such, or else." He leered at the group.

"Or else what?" One brave voice called from the back.

"Or else I will throw you into the darkest reaches of the galaxy where no-one can hear you scream," The Doctor replied easily, "But failing that, you will get a detention."

A note fluttered near Kurt's elbow, he opened it up and recognised Mercedes' rounded script:

_They obviously aren't doing any background checks on teachers anymore._

Kurt snorted and gained the attention of The Doctor once again.

"What's that?" He asked, leaning on the desk. Kurt discreetly hid the note in his sleeve.

"What's what?" He said smoothly.

"_That_, what's _that_?" The Doctor picked up Kurt's arm and shook it around until the note fell out.

"Hey!" Kurt burst out, "You can't do that, you're a teacher."

"No, I'm the Doctor and I can do whatever I like." The Doctor read the note quickly, "And no, they don't. I met that cheerleading coach of yours and she's more of a psychopath than me."

There was an appreciative giggle from the class.

"Now, what have you been learning other than the fact that Shakespeare was very clever and I could have just sneaked into this school and no-one would notice?"

"That your taste in headwear is atrocious." Kurt muttered, glancing at the fez perched on the Doctor's head. The Doctor raised an eyebrow at the countertenor, who avoided his gaze.

"Well then," The Doctor clapped his hands, "Talk amongst yourselves for a while, I have to make some calls." He sat on his desk with his back to the class and pulled an old-fashioned cell phone on his pocket.

Kurt turned around and glared at Mercedes.

"You could have gotten me killed," He said, "This guy is _nuts._"

"I'm sorry," She cringed, "But it turned out okay, and he's not that bad."

"Yeah; he appreciates bow-ties." He smiled, just as The Doctor yelled out:

"No, no, NO!" He jumped to his feet and threw the phone from his ear, it seemed to be smoking. It hit the wall and started beeping loudly, a couple of people screamed and many hid underneath their desks, convinced it was a bomb.

The Doctor grabbed a stapler and stepped on the phone, there was a nasty crunching noise before he beat it with the stapler, damaging it further. The beeping died out and the Doctor scooped up the wreckage of the phone and dropped it in the bin before turning to the gaping class.

"So... Shakespeare."

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**Review please :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**I am blown away at the response for this :D I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH! *sobs***

**Also, there is a fez destruction scene in the making, so don't worry ;)**

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"You. Bow-tie-boy. I want to talk to you." The Doctor pointed at Kurt and waggled his finger as the bell went for end of class. The teenager's insides twisted and his eyes went wide with alarm.

_What did I do to deserve this?_

Mercedes patted Kurt on the shoulder and gave him a sympathetic look.

"I'll see you in Glee." She mumbled with an uncertain glance at The Doctor. Kurt nodded and moved to stand in front of the supposed teacher, now leaning back on his desk and surveying Kurt with a knowing sort of smile.

"May I just say that the fez went out _years _ago, I would be happy to burn it for you if you would supply the matches." Kurt quipped before he could stop himself. The Doctor whipped the fez off his head and held it in his arms protectively.

"Oi lay off!" He wagged another finger at Kurt, "Fezzes are _just _as cool as bow ties, if not more." He looked down his nose at Kurt, "I thought _you_ would understand that."

Kurt felt a little bad about his outburst, and attempted to backtrack:

"It's certainly a bold fashion statement," He said weakly. The Doctor ignored him.

"The reason I have called you here," He said, replacing the fez, "Is simple: I want you to keep me updated on any and all strange or even slightly bonkers goings-on around here. Any unexpected behaviour-"

"Like yours you mean?" Kurt raised an eyebrow, and the Doctor folded his arms, smiling again.

"_Exactly_ like mine." He punctuated the first word by prodding the tip of Kurt's nose. The countertenor scowled and rubbed the spot the Doctor had poked. It was weirdly itchy for some reason. Kurt _seriously _couldn't figure this guy out.

"Ignore it, it will go away." The Doctor commented, noticing Kurt trying to discreetly scratch his nose.

"Why-"

"Doctor?"

The Scottish-accented voice came from the door, Kurt turned and saw a rather pretty redheaded woman standing just inside the doorframe.

"Have you- oh God, not _another _fez!" She groaned and entered the room, wearing a long red scarf with a blue outfit that Kurt approved of.

"I know, it's horrifying." Kurt grumbled to her, glaring at the offending hat.

"Leave. Off. The. Fez." The Doctor prodded the redheads nose and tried to poke Kurt's again, but he stepped out of range of his gangly arms.

"Urgh, whatever." The redhead huffed, "I just wanted to know if you've seen anything stranger than another person who wears ugly bow-ties."

"Hey!" The Doctor and Kurt both said at the same time.

"They're not ugly, _Amelia_! They're cool!" The Doctor folded his arms.

"Don't call me that, it's _Amy, _remember?" Amy/Amelia said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, yeah." The Doctor dismissed her with a wave of his hand, he spotted a couple of students hovering near the door, listening in. "Aaaaand Kurt here was just telling me about his day, weren't you Kurt?"

"No."

"Of course you were! And if you weren't then I think you should tell me now." The Doctor threw an arm over Kurt's shoulder and shook him slightly.

"Well I was shoved into the lockers this morning, then after I got changed I got a slushy thrown in my face, then I missed third period to clean myself off, then I was locked in the janitors closet for most of lunch, then I met you, and now it's time for Glee club so I really must be going if I want to avoid the wrath of Rachel Berry." Kurt reeled off quickly, intending to shock, shrugging the Doctor's arm from his shoulder, "If you'll excuse me-" He started to leave, suddenly aware Amy/Amelia's horrified face.

"But why does that happen to you?" The Doctor look fascinated, moving forward and leaning into Kurt's face, studying the boy carefully.

"I'm gay and I show it." Kurt said in a resigned voice.

"Aren't there others treated like you are?" The Doctor asked.

"Well I get the worst of it but the rest of the Glee club are mistreated too." Kurt looked anywhere but the Doctor's eyes, they unnerved him somewhat, they seemed far too old for a rather young man.

"Amy," The Doctor suddenly called to his friend, "I think it's time we partook in some after-school activities, don't you?"

_Great_, Kurt thought, _more instances where I have to look at that crime against fashion._

**Review please :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**SO SORRY! My laptop was broken and I've been forced to write things on my iPod instead and I'm rambling because I'm hungry and want to post this so OMG LOOK A CHAPTER!**

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"Kurt! Why are you so late?" The honking voice of Rachel Berry nearly deafened Kurt, he jabbed a thumb behind him at The Doctor and Amy that were following him. The Doctor looked like everything amused him and Amy seemed to be secretly plotting the fez's destruction.

"Ah, Kurt? Who is this?" Mr Schue furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Apparently they're the new English," He pointed at the Doctor, "And foreign language teachers." He pointed at Amy then took a seat next to Mercedes.

"Hello." Amy waggled her fingers at the group, smiling. Rachel snorted.

"Scottish doesn't count as being a foreign language." She said in disdain, "Mr Schue I think these people are spies."

Amy's smile had fallen into an angry scowl at Rachel's words, and the redhead stalked over to the girl and jabbed her finger into Rachel's chest. She put her hand on her hip, opened her mouth and started chattering in a language that certainly wasn't any form of English that Kurt had ever heard in his life. Eyes widened at Amy's jabbering outburst and when she finished many mouths were agog.

"Are you an alien?" Brittany wanted to know.

"_I'm _not." Amy rolled her eyes.

"What-?" Kurt started but was cut off by The Doctor.

"Sooooo..." He said loudly, "Glee club... _Glee club_... Glee _club_..."

"Doctor."

"Ah yes, thank you Amy."

New Directions were clearly agreeing with Kurt's theory of insanity in the newcomers.

"Excuse me, Mr Schue, but what are they doing here?" Rachel shot at the teacher, who rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably.

"I have no idea, Kurt?" Will looked at the countertenor expectantly.

"Don't look at me, I'm just their escort." Kurt held up his hands.

"We're here to... ah..." The Doctor grabbed Amy by the shoulders and positioned her in front of him, like a shield. "Amy! Explain why we're here!"

"Okay, ah, we're just-" Amy gave up floundering and sighed, "Basically, we're here because the Doctor thinks something strange is going on and it's his job to fix it. We were wondering if you knew anything."

"In Lima?" Puck snorted, "Nothing ever happens here, you picked the most boring town in the country to get interested in." He let his eyes trail over Amy, he grinned and Amy flashed him a flirty smile.

"Oh get a room." The Doctor said, spotting their exchange.

"Are you sure nothing strange has been going on? Anything out-of-the-ordinary?" Amy persevered.

"Other than Karofsky being even more vicious than usual to Kurt, I don't think so." Sam mentioned, and Kurt stiffened.

"Who's 'Karofsky'?" The Doctor asked, concerned.

"It's nothing, just a bully." Kurt said as offhandedly as he could, looking at the floor.

"Are you sure? Has he been acting much differently? Out of character at all?"

Kurt's mind flashed back to the locker room, and his stomach clenched once more.

"You could say that." He breathed, New Directions glanced at each other in confusion. To them, the bullying was just escalating, not too different to how Karofsky normally acted.

"Kurt-" Mercedes put a hand on his arm and he jumped slightly, and smiled at her.

"I'm fine," He said, all too aware of the dozens of eyes focused on him.

A sharp beeping rang through the room.

"Is your phone exploding again?" Kurt asked sarcastically. The Doctor pulled out some kind of silver and green thing from his pocket and held it up. The end was flashing, and The Doctor was looking at it with something like panic.

"What is it?" Amy asked quietly.

"Something is wrong," The Doctor was breathing faster than normal, "Something is very wrong."

"What do you mean?" Kurt demanded, getting up and approaching the Doctor.

"Ah, nothing, now if you'll just look right here for me- AMY CLOSE YOUR EYES." The Doctor squeezed his own eyes shut and pressed a tiny button on the handle of his screwdriver. A bright purple flash lit up the room and everyone except The Doctor, Amy and Kurt collapsed to the floor.

"What did you do?" Kurt shrieked, rushing to Mr Schue and checking his pulse.

"He's fine, they're fine, it's just-" The Doctor flailed his arms around. "Why are you still conscious?"

"I'm not an idiot, you said close your eyes and while you didn't say it to me I know enough to tell that you're either a genius or completely insane." Kurt hissed at The Doctor. He got up and poked the man in the chest. "Now tell me- what the hell is going on?"

The Doctor glanced at Amy. She nodded.

"Not here." She said, and pushed Kurt's poking finger away, taking his hand instead.

"Where then?" He asked as Amy tried to tug him out of the choir room.

"You'll like it," The Doctor grinned at Kurt, "Trust me."

Kurt hesitated, then he did.

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**Loongggg chapterrrr to make up for me having no idea what the huge-potentially-universe-destroying-problem will be, I'll ask Freya to stay over; she's my muse and always has good ideas.**

**The last scene was different and included fez destruction but I rewrote it because it didn't work I'M SORRY!**

**But fez destruction is immenent. *Evil laughter***

**Please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yay for updates!**

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"And what does a police box or whatever it is have anything to do with Glee?" Kurt wanted to know, being dragged by the hand towards said box by Amy.

"It doesn't," The Doctor replied happily, fiddling with a key next to the blue box's door. "Your Glee club is just a mindless distraction from the inevitability of death."

"Cheerful."

"Isn't it?" Amy said sarcastically, dropping Kurt's hand when she was sure he wasn't going to run away.

"Here we go!" The Doctor managed to unlock the door and stood with his back to it. "Are you ready?"

"Ready for what?" Kurt raised an eyebrow.

"Just- brace yourself." Amy patted him on the shoulder. The Doctor moved away from the door, grinning.

Kurt hesitated, then stepped inside.

Kurt was pretty sure that rather small blue boxes couldn't hold this much space. Screw that, he was completely sure that this was either completely, _completely _going against everything he had ever been taught in school for no reason other than to blow his mind, or Puck had put marijuana in baked goods again.

Kurt calmly left again, then walked around the police box once, slowly. Then he went back inside. Amy and The Doctor followed him, both with smug little grins on their faces.

"I am dreaming." Kurt told them easily, "Finn has forced me to watch too many sci-fi movies and my brain is having a nervous breakdown from all the virtual aliens."

"Well you're looking at a real alien right now;" The Doctor pointed out, "You seemed to be fine with it before."

"You're a-?" Kurt choked out, "Holy mother of Gucci." He muttered under his breath. He looked around the inexplicably enormous room again. "And you- and it's-" Kurt gestured around.

"Go on, say it." The Doctor grinned.

"It's bigger on the inside!"

"I love it when they say that."

Amy laughed.

"So let me get this straight," Kurt said, "Your spaceship is a bright blue police box that is somehow able to house an alien and a Scottish person."

"And her husband." The Doctor added.

"You have a-?"

"That I do."

Amy doesn't look the type for marriage, what with her shameless flirting with Puck. Nevertheless when Kurt glances to her hand a ring glitters there.

"Okay..." Kurt ran his fingers through his hair, then cursed as the hairspray came loose. He moved to a mirror and started fixing it when it started flashing rainbow colours, making him jump.

"I know it's a lot to take in." The Doctor threw an arm around Kurt's shoulders, "Aliens, husbands, time-travelling intergalactic police boxes..."

"You didn't mention the time-travelling part!" Kurt yelped, the Doctor looked confused.

"Didn't I?" His face brightened, "Well it can."

"I don't believe you." He said, smirking, "You're completely mental, this could easily be some delusion of yours."

"It can actually," Amy piped up, "I didn't believe him at first either."

"She was five, she totally believed me."

"Pedo much?"

"You made me _cook_ for you."

"_O-kay_! Let's prove to our new friend Kurt that we are not liars or crazy."

"Just a bit of both."

"Hush you."

"And how exactly," Kurt folded his arms, "Do you plan to prove that this is a time travelling spaceship?"

"It's called the TARDIS, and this is how: What's one date that you know off the top of your head?" The Doctor asked him, "I can take you there, and you will see that time travel is possible."

Kurt paused.

"January eighth 1998." He said, his face blank of expression.

"What happens on that day?" Amy asked, looking carefully at Kurt's face, she seemed concerned.

"It was the day before my mom died," Kurt explained, not wanting to lie, "Maybe I could see her again. Just once."

The Doctor, who had been fiddling with levers and buttons at some sort of control panel, stopped in his tracks.

"I'm sorry," He said, "We can't do that."

"Why not?" Kurt shot back.

"I've been down that road before," The Doctor turned to Kurt, "I took a girl back to the day her father died, she managed to stop his death."

"But that's good isn't it?" Kurt pleaded.

"Not when the universe almost tears itself apart for it." The Doctor put his hands on Kurt's shoulders, an apology in every line of his boyish face, "Some things in this world just have to happen. We can't risk that they won't because you want to see your mother again. There are things that are bigger."

Kurt's eyes were watery, and he shoved the Doctor away.

"Fine." He snapped, "Just... fine."

"Put it on random, any time, any place in the whole universe!" Amy said with badly-faked cheer.

"Listen," The Doctor said quietly, "There are some things that I would kill to take back, people that I wish to all the Gods I could see again. But I can't."

Kurt nodded, wiping his eyes with a little more understanding in them. The Doctor smiled.

"Ready to be amazed?" He asked, grinning. Kurt smiled and Amy hugged him.

"RORY!" She bellowed, almost deafening Kurt. "Come meet our new gay best friend!"

"Amy! Now is not the time to become a hag!"

Kurt laughed as the TARDIS whirred into action, shuddering their way into who knows where... or when, for that matter.

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**Review please :D Feel free to suggest things you want to happen, I'll try and include them all!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the slow updates! I've got like three different exams going on and homework ate my life, but I have a slim idea of where this story is headed now. Of course if there's anything you want to happen then I might update faster... *wink wink nudge nudge***

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"Hang on, you were panicking five minutes ago- you said you would explain once we got to the TARDIS." Kurt pointed out as The Doctor muddled around the various bits and bobs of the control panel. He and Amy were sprawled out on a seat just behind him while Kurt braided her hair.

"TARDIS stands for Time And Relative Dimension In Space."The Doctor said randomly, "If I'm going to tell you what's going on, I have to convince you that anything is possible." The Doctor stopped and considered. "Except a cat playing the keyboard. Now _that's_ impossible."

"But isn't there a-" Kurt was cut off when Amy clamped a hand over his mouth.

"Don't bother, believe me I've tried." She hissed, "He has trouble with the fact that Clark Kent is Superman."

"He's too much of a goody two-shoes!" The Doctor protested.

"RORY!" Amy yelled again, and Kurt jumped.

"Jesus woman stop doing that!" The Doctor scolded. "You'll scare him off and since I don't even know where the swimming pool is we can't have Kurt getting lost."

"There's a swimming pool?" Kurt gaped.

"And a library." Amy confirmed.

"How can you even remember that?"

"I have a great memory, Doctor."

The Doctor frowned at the controls. "This is going to take longer than I thought..." He mumbled.

"Isn't there some kind of universe-threatening... _thing_ happening? Like, now?" Kurt said.

"This is a _time-travelling spaceship._ I could get you back before breakfast." The Doctor pulled out his screwdriver and aimed it at the control panel, it lit up and made a buzzing sound.

"Seriously, is this a dream?" Kurt asked, a man popped up from a room seemingly under the floor.

"Hello!" He said, Kurt closed his eyes in horror.

"This isn't a dream, it's a _nightmare_." He sank back onto Amy's shoulder and surveyed her husband with disgust. "_What_ are you _wearing_?"

Rory glanced down at his life-preserver-style body warmer and dirty jeans.

"What's wrong with it?" He protested.

"You look like you're off on a fishing trip Captain Unfashionable." Kurt said scathingly, Amy laughed.

"Have you been down there all that time?" Kurt wondered aloud, "Are you a house-husband or something? I'm paraphrasing by the way, _this _cannot be considered a house."

"I'm starting as a teacher at the school in a few days." Rory explained, looking bitterly at the way Kurt and Amy were huddled together. "Don't want things to look too suspicious."

"Right, because the Doctor is nowhere near suspicious." Kurt rolled his eyes. Rory pouted.

"Amy, make him stop being mean to me!" He said, bridging on whiny.

"You sure know how to pick 'em Amy." Kurt drawled, smiling good-naturedly. Amy laughed again, Rory noticing the way her arm fell round his shoulders.

"Hey!" He pointed a finger at Kurt.

"He _is_ pretty cute though," Kurt ran his eyes over Rory, "Except for the fashion sense and whininess, he's a good catch." Kurt gave her a thumbs up. "He has the Kurt Hummel seal of approval."

"Oh!" An expression of great realisation came over Rory, "You're-?"

"Gay as the fourth of July? Yep." Kurt nodded.

"Don't mind him," Amy told Kurt, "He's just here to look pretty."

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"_Tell _me about it, my almost-stepbrother Finn is cute, but no brains whatsoever." He said, "At least Puckerman is more eloquent when he's insulting me."

"Which one's Puckerman?"

"The one you were making goo-goo eyes at." Kurt laughed.

"_What?_"

"Chill Rory, it's not like they're going to elope," Kurt sighed, "Puckerman has a reputation for tootin' 'em and bootin' 'em."

"I wouldn't mind..."

"Amy!"

The Doctor turned around and grinned at Kurt.

"Are you ready to rumble?" He bellowed, and Kurt sighed.

"I suppose so."

"Good!" The Doctor flicked a switch and the TARDIS made a much healthier noise than the one before, Kurt gasped as the ship rocked back and forth for a few seconds, before coming to a halt.

"Was that it? I expected something more, coming from you." Kurt said, getting up and dusting himself off.

"Leave me alone Mr Higher Expectations!"

"Where- sorry, _when _are we?" Kurt asked sarcastically, still not seriously believing that they had travelled through time. It was ridiculous.

"We don't know yet, that's kind of the point." Amy got up and skipped to the doorway, "Kurt, would you like to do the honours?" She gestured to the door.

"Very well," Kurt sighed in mock resignation, and swung open the doors, expecting wonders and spaceships and-

McKinley High parking lots?

"I would have thought with a time-travelling spaceship we would actually be able to travel." Kurt said dryly.

The Doctor rushed to his side and peeked out the door too.

"That's strange, I thought I-"

He was cut off when a low rumbling noise echoed from the TARDIS's controls, and buttons flashed violent colours on the panels there. The Doctor jolted into life, shoving Kurt the rest of the way out of the door and pulling Amy and Rory out by the limbs, all the while yelling "OUT OUT OUUUUUUT!"

"What is it? What's happening?" Rory cried, nearly stumbling onto the concrete. The Doctor slammed the door shut behind them, and once again Kurt marvelled at the amount of space in the seemingly tiny blue box. He didn't have long to admire it however, as it sadly disappeared in much the same way that Matt Rutherford did: Almost as though he was never there at all.

"Oh dear." The Doctor scratched the back of his neck. "Now things get complicated."

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**I would just like to stress the fact that I DON'T KNOW WHERE THIS STORY IS GOING.**

**So if there's anything, ANYTHING that you might like to happen in this story, I will try my hardest to put it in!**

**I don't care what it is, I will not judge you.**

**Seriously.**

**In other news; never look at my story favourites.**

**REVIEW!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the slow update, I have next to no time to write, and have had next to no sleep in the last few days. Them's be the night terrors.**

**Going to nap after I update... So tiredddddd.**

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"Is that... meant to happen?" Kurt asked, pointing at the place where the TARDIS used to be.

"It happens more than I'd care to admit." The Doctor said. Amy was massaging her temples muttering "At least we're not in it this time."

"What now?" Rory said. The Doctor thought hard for a minute before rushing to Kurt and gripping the countertenor by the shoulders.

"What was it you said about that boy you know acting strangely?" He said with that look in his eyes that made Kurt feel like he was being x-rayed.

"It's nothing," Kurt said quickly, "I'm sure it's nothing to do with _this_."

"I'm not one to take chances." The Doctor said, "Stay still." He put his index fingers on Kurt's temples and closed his eyes.

"Oh my God, that's..."

"I know it's strange, just relax. If it gets too much just open your eyes."

It was the weirdest sensation Kurt had ever experienced. It was almost like he was looking into his own mind, a large, white space with a lot of open doors. The Doctor roamed through freely, and when he spoke the sound came from everywhere and his mouth didn't move.

"If there's something you don't want me to see, just shut a door."

Almost every door closed, the Doctor turned and gave him a sympathetic look.

"Which one is the one about this boy?" He asked, and once more his mouth didn't move. Just behind him a couple of doors creaked opened, and voices spilled out:

"_-Are you so scared of?"_

"_-Have you told anyone?-"_

The Doctor stepped towards the door where Kurt was yelling and watched. Kurt turned his back but couldn't drown out the shouts from the doorway.

"_-all us gays are secretly out to molest and convert you. Well guess what, hamhock? You're _not_ my type!"_

"_That right?"_

"_Yeah. I don't dig on chubby boys who are going to be bald by the time they're thirty."_

"_Do not push me Hummel."_

"_You gonna hit me? Do it."_

"_Don't push me!"_

"_Hit me cause it's not gonna change who I am. You can't punch the gay out of my any more than I can punch the ignoramus out of you!"_

"_THEN GET OUT OF MY FACE!"_

"_You are nothing but a scared little boy who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are!"_

Kurt heard The Doctor's short intake of breath, before the distant noise of Karofsky slamming the lockers and his exit. There was silence from that door, and there was just the brief chatter from the other before:

"_I'll kill you."_

Kurt forced his eyes open and stumbled away from The Doctor, hating the shock, the _pity _in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry."

"I'm _fine._" Kurt said fiercely, drawing himself up, "These things happen."

"Not those things." The Doctor said, and Kurt had to repress a sob.

"That was completely pointless wasn't it?" He choked out, "There's nothing to go on." He hated how emotional he was getting, but after reliving that kiss all the hurt and unfairness was rushing back. Amy saw this and enveloped him in a hug, stroking his back while he buried his head in her shoulder.

"Could you tell me-" The Doctor started, but Amy cut him off angrily:

"Shut it Doctor, he's had someone about twice his size trying to suck his face off and kept it a secret for all this time, _he doesn't need questions!_"

"No no no this could be very important," The Doctor babbled, "Kurt, Kurt look at me."

Kurt tentatively raised his head and submitted to The Doctor's intense gaze.

"Have you seen anything that might suggest that this boy is a vampire?"

Amy and Rory groaned and Kurt frowned at him.

"Vampires aren't real." He mumbled.

"They are, it's just they're all in Venice." Rory piped up, Kurt stared at him over Amy's shoulder like he was mad (which, come to think of it, he probably was).

"It's true, just leave it." Amy muttered offhandedly.

Kurt jerked away from her, running his hands through his hair again.

"Okay: My friends have been knocked out, I've had my memories invaded, _and my hair looks like I've been dragged through a hedge!_" He yelled, eyes wild. "I want out of this weird deal, I don't care if you're an alien-" he pointed at the Doctor "-or if you're Scottish-" Amy looked insulted "-or if _you_ look like you came straight out of the last episode of 'What Not to Wear'-" Rory was indifferent "-just _leave me alone._"

The trio in front of him blinked, but he didn't wait to see any further reaction. Kurt turned on his heel and stalked back to the school.

* * *

**My friend suggested that the Doctor suspects Karofsky is a vampire so I just had to include it.**

**I cannot thank you enough for all your support, I swear I'm getting a review or alert every couple of days.**

**I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH.**

**PLEASE REVIEW.**

**I'M GOING TO SLEEP NOWWWW.**


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